Again, the time since my last post is so long...  To be honest, I thought about writing many times, but what discouraged me were slow and nearly insignificant changes "downwards".  But let's start from the beginning.

For few months I was going to a chiropractor, who did manual adjustment, acupuncture and electro-stimulation of the muscles in the back, shoulders and knees areas.  he also convinced me to buy insoles for my boots (can't wear shoes or runners, it's heavy boots only: slip resistant, waterproof, steal toe and holding the ankle firmly - my balance problems are much increased) and for the slippers.  it help a lot, but for a relatively short time only: about half a year.  I'm still able to walk some distance on a good day - but the point is, I can no longer walk on a bad day.  Had to start the application process for a motorised wheelchair - which, obviously, upset me a lot, and since there is a strong link between the mental and the physical aspects of health, without getting into what affected what it suffice to say that from a rather long-lasting 3 weeks) chest infection I developed pneumonia.  Fever, all the muscles and joint are hurting like hell, breathing is difficult and painful, and the cough is from the heels up...  Thank God for my friend and neighbour AKB, who was coming in every four hours with hot drink so that I could take paracetamol... (am after three antibiotics which didn't work - time for old fashioned hot water with lemon, garlic and honey!)

So, since my last entry I got firmly on the one - if not too - steps lower and closer to the end.  Every time it happens I get sad, upset, I go through shorter or longer period of adjustment "why me", "why is it going so fast", "will I manage ... " - my bucket list, of which I managed to tick off some things, but not everything...  And the question - will I manage to get to do few more things before I'm gone?

Although fibromyalgia is incurable, deadly, progressive, debilitating, etc. etc. - one doesn't die of it.  One dies of complications, of related illnesses.  That's why this bout of pneumonia - the first I ever had - is so difficult: because I know that this is precisely what may cause me to kick the bucket.  and although generally speaking I am ready, there are just few things which I need to take care off before I sniff it.  So I just hope it's not my time yet.